Long Lasting Marriages

Still doing the 30 days of gratitude.

Today I am grateful for my grandparents!!!

They are such a blessing to me. They have been married 55 years! Such a inspiration and example of an amazing couple!! My grandmother has taught me to lean on God and to trust Him with all my heart!




Aren't they so cute!?!?!? :)

I LOVE THEM DEARLY!!!!!!!!!!

What are you grateful for?

What's for dinner???

If memory serves me correctly, I managed to fend for my "single" self without NEAR as much consternation over meal planning! I ate what I wanted, when I wanted and how I wanted with nary a complaint from my dinner guest aka moi.  But here lately, meal planning is becoming more of a chore!!!  Though I have stacks and stacks of cookbooks, paper clippings and recipe stashes I cannot get into a groove.  I find myself either cooking the same-o-thing or worse, ordering out.

Where or where can a girl find a month's worth of healthy, non-boring, quick-cooking, budget friendly meals????


My latest plan of attack is Pinterest!  I am continually amazed at how much free time virtual Moms & Wives seem to have.  Like seriously, how are you running kids here & there, decorating your house for each season, cooking every night and saving money????  But that's for another post :). 

For now, my plan is to rely upon those ladies to scour the web and lead me to a recipe treasure trove.  I just threw this:

Courtesy of Living Life of Riley!   Ms. Nikki has a ton of crockpot success stories (cause I wanna know that it actually turned out well) that I'll be relying upon in a quest to get my cooking groove back.  To account for the sugar, I plan to serve this with a healthy side that Ms. Giada whipped up this weekend:

Please share your go to Crock Winners!

Lady Hawk

30 Days of Gratitude

Are you all participating in the 30 days of gratitude?? I have been doing it on my personal blog.

Today (Day 13) I am grateful for my husband.

I LOVE ME SOME HIM!!

He loves God! He loves me!! He puts up with all my craziness and is always there for me when I need him. He treats me like a queen and I am honored to be able to treat him like a King!!

 

What are you grateful for?

DCSquared

#1 Priority

 

Is it your #1 priority?

 

DCSquared

Happy 20th Anniversary to the Obamas!!

Happy 20th Anniversary to the Obamas!!

President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama are celebrating 20 years today. The couple were married on October 3rd, 1992.

The presidential debate is also tonight from 9:00-10:30 p.m. EST. So this is a big day for The Obamas! :o)

Happy Anniversary!

 

DCSquared

A snowballining we will GO!

My new hubbie and I setup a debt repayment plan well before we were even engaged let alone married.  We sat down and had a long heart to heart about our financial ups and downs, lessons learned and hoop dreams.  We walked away with a pretty clear picture of where each of us stood individually and where a merging of households would lead us collectively.  Shortly afterwards, we started our "debt-snowball" and plowed head first into reaching our ultimate goal:

Pay Everything Off.

Having a laser focus on paying off debt can distract you from establishing a sound savings strategy.  In theory, it's really easy to apply every extra penny straight to your debt.  Doing so gets you that much closer to dropping a creditor from your master list.  But that can also leave you in quite a pickle.  Because what happens when the unexpected bill pops up?  How are you supposed to pay for that new expense when you just sent your latest windfall to Visa & MC?  You are exposed.  Adding the new bill to the coals and charging it only kicks it down the road; it's gathering dust (interest  & possibly penalties) along the way.  Let me tell you, nothing can ruin a "Yay! We paid off So-n-so" party quicker than a surprise guest via the mailbox.

Yes, I know Dave Ramsey says "save up $1000 before you start attacking your debt."  But doesn't it seem like there's a $1000 emergency (and I mean a true emergency not a "forgotten" bill) springing up each time you're about to pass GO? 

AHA moment: maybe Dave's $1000 target needs boosting in this new millenia?  Maybe he's right but just lowballing us or perhaps we just need to take some creative license and set our own target....(it never ceases to amaze me when I answer my own question while sharing my thoughts with someone.  Duh!)

So how do you handle shifting focus?  What if one or heck, even both spouses, are less disciplined one month?  There's a fine line between chastising and correcting.  You don't want to come down too hard but you also can't standy by and the let the whole ship go down.  And who likes being the bad guy all of the time?  Worse than that, it's rather uncomfortable when your shipmate points out your own guilt.  Oh, what a tangled web we weave when at first we attempt to build net worth! LOL!

Wish us luck.  We're only 'o-ffficially' 6 months in and the both of us are notoriously impatient when it comes to making progess.  We want to make headway yesterday!  And one mis-step can readily have us calling "Slacker" if we let it. 

Appreciate any wise words you can share.

Lady Hawk

Saving for a rainy day

Hindsight is usually not your friend.  Hindsight is more like a spoiled brat sticking his tongue out at you.  The Obvious is not much better.  The Obvious tends to hide behind Hindsight only peeking his head out right after your watch ticks to "Too Late".

Your only real defense against Hindsight is to arm yourself with as much info as humanly possible.  What did G.I. Joe tell us at the end of every episode?  "Knowing is half the battle."  Yeah, I'm seriously dating myself but he knew that the only thing worse than Hindsight was her snooty cousin, "You Didn't Know That?"

Over the past few weeks, I have spent more than enough time with these partners in crime.  They have really worked my last good nerve. 

But that's A-OK.  I.AM.NOT going down easily.

Did you know that there's a super simple blood test that measures your fertility?  Yep, you can measure your chances of having a baby with little more than a finger prick.

Did you know that as of 5 years ago, fertility experts have perfected the art of freezing eggs?  Yep, before that, the process was largely unsuccessful.  The eggs did not thaw well and so were unusable.  But all of that has changed now.

Did you know that armed with those two bits of information, you have the potential to A) track your fertility by having your gynecologist administer the Anti-Mullerian Hormone (AMH) test annually and B) set aside some of your eggs while they are younger and fresher? 

I seriously believe the AMH test should be offered along with our annual Pap Smears to any woman of childbearing years.  The final decision to take the test should be the patient's but our gynos should make it common practice to make us aware of this test.  If you agree, please sign my petition.

Yeah, it's a long shot but I have to do something.  I have to tell somebody.  I wish someone had told me.

Friends: save for a rainy day!

Lady Hawk

Time keeps on ticking...

Ahhh, the ever-present biological clock!  Mother Nature keeps time like no other.  You can lollygag about life if you want to, but you may end up on the short end of the stick!

That's where I am, friends.  On the short-end of the stick.  All reports point to our having a very narrow window to get knocked up.  Even then, we're gonna need "assistance".  My long battle with the broids has left my uterus a bit, shall we say, bumpy?  Actually, the fert specialist said it was "distorted".  He confirmed that the mass on my left fallop tube was not a fibroid...it was 4 fibroids.  Awesome.

While last year's UFE took care of my symptoms, the broids have not completely disappeared.  So to decrease my chances of a miscarriage, he has steered us towards a top-notch uterine surgeon in hopes of smoothing out the landing strip.

Yay!  Another surgery :) 

I shouldn't say that.  There's no pity party over here.  Seriously.  I've had so many that it really isn't a big deal anymore.  Sad, but true.  Plus, it'll totally be worth it ifWHEN our prayers are answered.

From what I've learned so far, this is all a numbers game.  How old are ya?  How many eggs do you have?  How many good eggs do you have?  How many other chicks like you wound up preggers?  So after the surgery, we'll be sipping on an "ovulation stimulating" cocktail.  And the odds say that if this is gonna work for us, the magic will happen in one or two cycles.

I should have dubbed this the "Amazing Race"!

Lady Hawk

QOTD: Quote of The Day

One of the first keys to a successful Marriage, is Communication; The first key to successful Communication, is Listening.

-Husband and Wife for Life

I HEART MixBook

I often joke that my family is forever looking for a reason to bake a cake.  We celebrate something just about every weekend.  Unfortunately, I miss a good deal of these simply because I do not get back to TN as frequently as I'd like.  I average about once every two months or so and A LOT can happen between my visits!  But I do try to make it home for our "big" holidays.  One of those is definitely Easter.  After church, we all gather in Granny's front yard for "PICTURE TIME!"  I literally run around singing "It's picture time, it's picture time, it's time to get your ready for your pictures!" sung to that "Crayons and your pencils" ditty.  After the pics, we try to have our annual Egg Hunt just before sitting down to a proper Southern Sunday dinner :).

In recent years, the popularity of our Easter Egg hunts have tapered off a bit simply because we didn't have any younguns.  But thanks to a recent baby boom that has us blossoming with new babies, we've been able to bring back the family tradition.  This year marked the first hunt for one of our youngest grandkids.  Here he is just after getting caught stuffing eggs in his pockets!

After the hunt, two of my all-time faves snuggled up on a lawn chair for a chat:

 

I absolutely love this pic of my Sweetie and my Granny.  After I took this, Granny got to fussing about how much she hates digitial cameras.  "I never gets to see pictures since they came out with those thangs.  Y'all don't never print pictures off anymore!"  I cracked up!  But she's right. The most we'll do as far as sharing goes is to post them on Facebook.  So she does miss out.  That got me to thinking...

Ding! Ding! Ding! 

I'll make her a MixBook of these pictures for Mother's Day!  She'll love that!  Since not all of my own pics turned out well, I collected pictures from my relatives who were there that day.  I even snagged some off of Facebook.  Two of my uncles couldn't make it home, so I had them email me pics of their families.  Once I had all of those together, I used the "Classic Easter" template to build a photobook and had it shipped directly to her.

It arrived a week early and before I had a chance to tell her it was on the way.  So when it arrived, it just had the shipping address with no indication who sent it.  She was blown away.  She told my mom, "Look at what somebody from CA sent me!  I don't know how they got a hold of these pictures or how they put this picture book together but I sure am grateful they did it.  I just love this!"

After a good laugh and some splaining, Mama tolder her that I was the culprit and that the book was her Mother's Day gift.  She was tickled pink.

Major. Score.

I highly recommend this as a surprise for your older or less-than-tech-savvy relatives :).

Excited to see Hubby??

Do you get excited to see your husband when he gets home??

Remember Ricky Ricardo used to announce himself to Lucy???

Maybe it's the newlywed stage, maybe I love me some him. But I really do get butterflies when I hear the keys in the door! My baby is HOME!! I go up to him and hug him! it's really so corny, but I LOVE IT

Is it just me??? LOL

E=DC2

Runners, take your mark!

I meant to post this on 5.18.12 so my references to "tomorrow" are actually in the past.  Sorry :)

As I mentioned in my previous post, I had the UFE surgery last September.  This was our first strike against our arch nemesis: da broids.  I immediately saw an improvement in my quality of life.  My cycles jumped on a normal 28 day schedule and the heavy flows were gone ending my chronic anemia symptoms.  We timed the surgery to allow me plenty of time to recuperate before the wedding & honeymoon.  So as soon as the dust settled from the wedding, I found a gynecologist who specializes in treating "moms-to-be-with-challenges".  I knew going in that we had several strikes against us:

1. I'm getting a little long in the tooth.  I'll be 40 this December.  My eggs are not getting any younger!
2. Though dead and significantly smaller, the aforementioned broids are still in my uterus.  I still have some shrinking to go; it's something that continues over time.  But until they are all shriveled up, they are still taking up precious cargo space.

So one of the first things my new gyno wanted to do was establish a baseline on my fertility.  She ordered two routine tests to give us a snapshot of what we were up against.

The first test was a simple blood test to measure my Anti-Mullerian Hormone (AMH) blood levels.  This substance is thought to be a strong indicator of a woman's "ovarian reserves" or egg supply for short.  The experts have established a chart based upon a woman's age, uterine history and AMH levels to gauge her egg supply.

CHALLENGE #1: My AMH levels are below normal suggesting that I have a low egg supply.  Awesome.

The second test was a hysterosalpingogram (HSG) to determine if my fallopian tubes were up to the task.  During this test, a radiologist shoots dye into the uterus and tracks how the dye travels through your pipes.  Ideally, the dye should fill up the uterine cavity, flow through the fallopian tubes and spill out into the abdomen.

CHALLENGE #2: My left fallopian tube was blocked by some mass (not a fibroid).  Wasn't nothing flowing over there.  Even. More. Awesomeness.

With those results, my gyno ordered me straight to a reproductive endocrinologist.  I didn't get to pass GO!, collect $200 or pick up a 'Get out Jail Free!' card.  She was done with me.  How exciting!

Tomorrow's our first meeting with the repro man.  I'm not expecting much from this session besides orders for even more tests.  I'm hoping these will just call for blood samples cause my uterus is still a little salty with me over the HSG (a common side effect is "uterine discomfort").  So I'm surprisingly calm as I write this with our session just hours away.  Week before last week was a whole 'nother story.  That's when my gyno first delivered...rather ungraciously...the news (She SUCKS so I'm planning to find me another gyno as soon as I can).  I was incredibly upset, completely overwhelmed and pretty sad about my outlook.  But the initial shock has worn off plus, I've since had a chance to speak to a nurse with the dern decency & patience to explain my results and possible resolutions.  More importantly, I've been praying...ALOT.  So I'm ready to face this thing (well, at least tomorrow) head-on. 

Plus, my sweetie will be by my side.

Lady Hawk

Let's play a little catch-up

The other day, Donnica sent me a link to a Life.Love&Marriage blog post on fibroids. After reading Faith's post, I left the following comment.

I have battled fibroids for 10+ years.  More than a dozen of the boogers have pitched a tent in my uterus.  I'm sure you know by now that the qty of the invaders doesn't really matter.  What matters is their individual/collective sizes and positioning.  Have one sit on your bladder or bowels and the pain can drop you to your knees.  But have an innocuous one in your uterine wall and you may never know it's even there.  With that, some women are fortunate enough to have broids and never experience a single side effect - either during their cycles or pregnancies.  My broids were such pests that I dubbed myself the modern day "woman at the well".  They triggered monthly cycles that ran every 3 weeks & came along with the heavy sloughing, cramps etc.  I've had more accidents, mostly really public, and missed more days of work, more celebrations, more outings, etc. than I care to recount.  The excessive blood loss also meant that I had to get regular iron infusions to deal with the chronic anemia.  I've had two myomectomies and one really scary ER visit in 07 that brought me within days of an emergency hysterectomy.  I literally couldn't walk for 2 weeks: my broids were so swollen and so painful that my abdomen completely spazzed out on me.  I thought my pelvis was gonna split in two.  Fortunately, I had some serious prayer warriors on my side and was blessed with a reprieve.  For about 2 years, my cycles were normal, at least for me, and the pain was gone.  But then they flared up again last year...engaged but childless, I began reviewing my options.  Another myomectomy likely would not have given me long term relief. Wanting to try for kids, a hysterectomy was out of the question and an ablation was just as bad that.  Lastly, the magnetic resonance was too unproven to consider (plus, it wasn’t covered by insurance).  Luckily, I knew of uterine fibroid emobilization (UFE) and Dr. John Lipman, http://www.atlii.com/index.cfm.  I'd considered it off and on for years but never pulled the trigger.

Thankfully, I got my life back on September 29th, 2011.  A few well-placed micro particles starved off the monsters in my belly :).  My periods returned to a normal 28 day cycle with NO pain, NO sloughing and NO excessive flows.  Even better, I haven't needed an iron transfusion since before the surgery.  My energy and overall health went through the roof!  My DEEPEST regret was that I did not pursue the UFE when I first heard of it, probably in 06 --- I hesitated time and time again.  I urge you to visit the site and consider this option.  You don’t have to go through the crap that broids bring. They can seriously TAKE. OVER. YOUR. LIFE.  The babies will come but you need to be able to enjoy your life and your new marriage.

Writing that seemed like the perfect intro to bring our readers up to speed on what I like to call "Da Quest".  Da Quest is quite simply Team Hawkins' plan/hopes/dream/faith-driven quest to build a family.  As this journey will be my top priority over the coming months, I've decided that I'm going to share the experience here.  I'm hoping doing so will help me cope with the physical, mental, emotional and hormonal roller coaster that I'm about to jump on (I was a complete wreck 2 weeks ago but more on that later).  I'm hoping that sharing will help me sort out my feelings and fears.  I'm also likely to VENT about the countless people who bombard me with the "when are you getting pregnant?!?" questionsDEMANDS...sheesh.

Please know that I have absolute faith that God's good and perfect will for our lives and our family will prevail in this situation.  But I'd be lying to you if I didn't admit that worry sometimes consumes me.  When it does, I've found that prayer and submission has been my sole comfort.  I've accepted that this situation is in God's hands and totally beyond my control.  So I hope you don't mind hearing about this from time to time.  I promise not to get too sappy! :)

Lady Hawk

QOTD: Quote of The Day

”More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse”

~ Doug Larson

God's Plan for Happy Marriage

Yes, God really does have a plan for marriage. Here is a great FREEBIE that goes over a few of the things that God purposes for us in marriage.

Click here to download the free PDF or ebook version.

Have you thought about what God's plan is for your marriage?

E=DC2

Hawkins Affair Recap

Hawkins Affair Recap

Here is it, a few days past my 6 MONTH anniversary and I'm STILL slacking ont the recap! 

For shame! 

You, see, what had happened was...the photographer sent our wedding pics on 2 CDs.  The ceremony was on one and the reception on another. 

Well...I lost the ceremony CD.  I know.  WHO does that?  Who plans for months, gets married and then loses their pics!?!? 

I do, that's who.

Worse yet, I totally stalled asking her for a new one just hoping that my forverlosingsomething self would remember what I did with it.

NO LUCK. 

So I finally sucked it up and asked her for a copy.  It arrived broken.  And somewhere along the way, I have managed to lose the CD with the reception pics.

So you see, I'm in a bit of a quandry here :)

But never fear, I'm working on a 3rd copy of our pics and am pulling pics from the guest photos.  Hopefully, I'll have things sorted out before our 1 year anniversary :).

Lady Hawk

Blog Name Change

We's MARRIED NOW!!!!!!!! :)

Now that we are all married we are no long FIGHTING BRIDEZILLA!! Whew...thank goodness! That was almost a losing battle LOL

Now we are...


DRUM ROLL


.
.
.
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CHASING EVER AFTER!!! :)

What do you guys think of the new name?? :)

E=DC2

QOTD: Quote of The Day

Stay busy doing what is required to strengthen your marriage. This will leave less time to be concerned with what can destroy it. 

 -Husband and Wife for Life

Why Are Men So Upset about "Think Like A Man"?

Why are the men so upset about this movie/book??? 


Really...they are NOT giving away secrets!! LOL! This is really some old school advice. Better known as common sense. Unfortunately, everyone does not have this. When you have babies having babies, sometimes that good advice does not get passed along.

Is it wrong if a women comes out of the theater thinking...

• I need to develop some standards for myself and require some respect
• I don't need to sleep with every Tom, DICK, and Harry...maybe they should wait for my loving
• Maybe just maybe the man of my dreams does not have to be 6'4", tall, dark, and handsome oh wait...that's my boo LOL

So you see, there really is some sound advice. No giving away the game, not man bashing...just arming women with some COMMON SENSE!!

WHY Y'ALL MAD??? LOL

Think Like A Man came in #1 in the country. Making more than $33 Million this opening weekend. Can we not just at least be excited about that?

And outside of it all of that, this was one of the funniest movies I've seen in a while. I know about a month ago I posted Who's Funny?? I just was NOT on the Kevin Hart bandwagon. Well how about I'm ready to catch a ride??? LOL He really did make this movie. I feel like I need to see it again just so I can hear every bit of his foolishness! SMH

Anyway, GO SEE THE MOVIE!! Don't let the title fool ya!!

E=DC2

Long overdue recap

I went back through some of the posts from 2011 and I saw that I did an introduction of being a Mrs post as well as a bouquet recap. I also did a post about my horrible experience with my Day of Coordinator. Somehow I've forgotten to do a whole wedding recap. And being that it's been almost EIGHT MONTHS...I'm not even going to TRY to pretend to remember all the details!! :o)

We were featured on Yes We Wed's blog site. There are tons of great pictures there! I guess you can say that I'm cheating a little and just directing you to the link for that post! But hey...I did SOMETHING, right??? :o)

Anyway, head on over and check out a few of our pics as well as some dialog about how we met and how E proposed (I know...a repeat) Goodness...I'm trying!!! :o) LOL

Also, be on the look out for more post about life after the wedding!! Hope you all stay with us and enjoy our lives as well go on this journey called marriage!

TOODLES!!!

E=DC2